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Ransom Note

Gerald is in his study, putting together a model boat in a glass bottle at his desk. He delicately places on the masts with a pair of long forceps when Claudine enters with a note.

Claudine Gerald, can I talk to you for a second?

Gerald One moment.

He finishes placing the mast and swivels around on his chair to face Claudine.

Gerald Yeah?

Claudine I found this note and it's a little bit concerning.

Gerald A note?

Claudine Yeah, it looks like a ransom note.

She shows him the note. The text on it is put together with newspaper and magazine clippings.

Gerald Oh dear.

Claudine Yeah it's's a ransom note for my life.

Gerald What?

Claudine Yeah. It has instructions to leave £10,000 in a suitcase at a time and place or I'll be killed.

Gerald That's terrible.

Claudine Yeah, yeah it is...uhm, Gerald? Were you...were you going to have me kidnapped?

Gerald What? Are you serious?

Claudine Were you going to have me kidnapped and use this note to get the police to pay the ransom?

Gerald That's ridiculous. What makes you think I made that note?

Claudine Well it was in your nightstand to start with.

Gerald I didn't put it there.

Claudine Also, the text is put together from Men's Health magazines and articles from The Sun and you always read those.

Gerald Loads of people read that.

Claudine Right but you glued them on a piece of paper which has your office letterhead on it.

Gerald No I didn't.

Claudine Yes you did, it says “Gerald's Aquatic Taxidermy” right there at the bottom.

Gerald Does it?

Claudine Yeah.

Gerald Oh.

Claudine Were you going to do it then?

Gerald ...yeah.

Claudine Gerald, we discussed this. You need to stop coming with get rich quick schemes at my expense. This is you taking a massive life insurance out on me and trying to push me in front of a bus all over again. I told you I don't appreciate it when you do things like this.

Gerald I know.

Claudine Ok, now have you already called the kidnappers?

Gerald ...yeah.

Claudine Well call them off, I have an important meeting today and I can't afford the distraction.

Gerald Yeah, alright, sorry.

Claudine Ok, good and if you could please put my passport back into my dresser when I'm out. You're tried stealing my identity before, it doesn't work.

Claudine exits.

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